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Pierced by Love Page 4
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“Would you rather that I lie to you and tell you that it didn’t bother me in the least that I was developing feelings for him? I’m not that heartless!” Her pleading expression tugged at Noelle’s heart, yet she managed to squelch the last ounce of sympathy that existed there. “I don’t mean to trivialize this, but now that I know Chase better, I can understand him wanting a more mature woman in his life.”
Anger boiled inside Noelle. “Is that what he told you?” she said hotly. “How well do you know Chase, Melody? Really know him?”
Melody’s face turned ashen at Noelle’s outburst, her brown eyes filling with unshed tears.
Noelle softened her voice. “Look, I get that Chase would be attracted to you since you are both RMs, but honestly, what do the two of you really have in common? How can you know that he’s the one for you?”
“I know it sounds crazy, Noelle, but I think that we were supposed to meet each other through you. We talk about everything and nothing.” A soft smile came to her lips. “He’s smart and funny, and we agree on all the major issues. We have similar interests and we are both ready to settle down. It might not sound like much, but I promise you, despite the roundabout way our relationship developed, I’ve prayed about this and felt the Spirit telling me that Chase was the right man for me. I’m just sorry that it happened this way, Noelle.”
“Well, you should have been honest with me,” she insisted.
“I agree,” Melody said somberly.
“Jessie already had another girl lined up to room with us after Jill got married. I stuck my neck out for you because I thought we would have so much fun together. But instead, I’ve been pulling my hair out from trying to live up to your impossibly high standards. Imagine my surprise when I discovered they are actually double standards.” Knowing her hurtful words were hitting their mark did nothing to make Noelle feel better.
Now Melody’s voice sounded a little testy. “Please understand, Noelle. I’ve tried to explain my actions. If you don’t believe me, that’s your choice. But here’s something else you might want to think about.”
Oh no, Noelle thought. Here we go again. Another well-meaning but misguided lecture from my big sister.
“Chase mentioned that he has tried to give you the time you need to grow in the gospel, but you haven’t really made much progress, all things considered. Sure, you’ve gone through the temple, but have you pondered what it all means? You’re good at attracting returned missionaries, but if you want to keep one, you’re going to have to put more thought and effort into the process.”
Noelle flinched at the awful words. Why hadn’t Chase talked to her about his concerns? She took a shuddering breath and told herself to calm down. Melody had always been straitlaced, but this mission of hers had made her downright prudish.
The doorbell rang and Melody stood to answer it. No surprise, Chase was on the other side. Melody must be attending his ward today. Her voice still held a bit of an edge when she called, “Bye, Noelle,” then was gone.
FOUR
PIERCE WAS SITTING in the chapel while waiting for sacrament meeting to begin, trying in vain to tune out the nonsensical chatter of the people behind him. When had the lower classmen become so obnoxious? He’d started noticing his growing discontent with them only recently. He usually liked to joke around with them, but lately their silliness grated on his nerves.
Holding back a sigh, he glanced toward the open doorway leading out to the hallway and classrooms of the institute building and saw Noelle Jensen standing there, nervously scanning the room. A girl in a brown dress approached her. From the way Noelle’s face scrunched up and she shook her head in consternation, he gathered their exchange was not pleasant. Noelle scanned the room once more. Strangely, he hoped that her gaze would connect with his. When it did, he inclined his head, beckoning her over. Her shoulders and expression loosened. Slowly approaching Pierce, she asked, “Are you saving this seat for anyone?”
Now that she was closer, Pierce could see the dark rings beneath her eyes. She looked terrible. Attempting to mask his shock, he picked up his scriptures from the next seat to make room for her. “You,” he offered. His friend Kurt would have to find somewhere else to sit.
“Thanks.” The soft fabric of her striped skirt brushed his arm as she settled into her seat. Pierce was at a loss for words. This was the first time he had seen her since he’d heard about the breakup. Of course, he’d heard a few other students talking about it earlier when he’d arrived, such as Kasey Hamilton, whose loud, whiny voice had carried to him from a few rows back.
He waited for her to open a conversation, but she kept staring at the floor. Feeling the need to break the ice, Pierce gently nudged her shoulder. “Hey,” he said softly. “How are you holding up?”
She turned to him with her brows creased and her fists clenched. “I’m so tired of everyone asking me that, Pierce,” she bit out the words. “So let me just make it clear once and for all. I’m—just—fine!”
Pierce couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped his lips. She was kind of cute when she was mad. “Yeah, I can see that.”
Now she was scowling. Pierce just grinned at her until her lips slowly loosened into a reluctant smile of their own. “All right, so I’m not fine. I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster, okay?” She huffed. “I’m sick of everyone looking at me as if I’ve grown two heads.” Tilting her head and moving her eyes to the right, she silently indicated two girls a few rows ahead who had turned to watch them.
An unexpected surge of protection had him staring the offenders down. They took the hint quickly and turned around again just as Bishop Thornton stood to conduct the meeting.
“Thanks,” she whispered.
“No problem,” he whispered back, hesitating only a moment before deciding to take a chance. “He’s an idiot. You know that, right?”
Her sad smile tugged at his heart. In a shaky voice, she responded, “Is it so wrong to still want to be with that idiot?”
Barely managing to keep a straight face, he fought against the urge to put his arm around her and pull her toward him. “You’ll be all right. You’re a lot stronger than you think.”
Her eyes widened as she studied him carefully. “Thanks,” she said softly.
Fearing that he’d be a goner if he stared into her sorrowful face much longer, Pierce cleared his throat and shifted away from her to get ready for the opening prayer.
Noelle didn’t quite know what to make of Pierce Logan. Sure, he’d been her home teacher a few years ago, and their roommates were buddies, and they chatted now and then, but it had been a long time since she’d had a real conversation with him. He was a good-looking guy with rich brown hair and deep brown eyes that seemed to see a lot more than he let on. His features were well-shaped with a straight nose, a firm chin, and playful dimples on either side of his mouth.
Not that she’d been staring! She scolded herself for studying him a little too closely.
She’d been with Chase Dunlop for the past eleven months, after all. To say that she’d been a little preoccupied with him was a huge understatement. She’d been counting down the days to the anniversary of their first date when wham! Everything changed in one horrible day.
But Noelle appreciated Pierce’s protection and encouraging words today. Aside from Bishop Thornton, no one else had told her that she was strong enough to handle this. It was an amazing feeling, like an arrow shot straight and true, the power of which bolstered her confidence for the first time in days.
They stood to leave when sacrament meeting was over. Pierce turned to her and said, “Hey, Noelle, just remember that the Lord never gives us more than we can handle.” With that bit of advice, he squeezed her arm and melted into the crowd.
Nearly two hours later, Noelle emerged from her Relief Society class and was making her way to the front of the building when someone tapped her shoulder from behind. It was the ward clerk. “Noelle, Bishop Thornton would like to see you in his office for a few
minutes, if you don’t mind.”
“Right now?”
“Yes.”
“Okay,” she replied, wondering what this was about. She did an about-face and slammed right into Pierce. Being nearly as tall as him, it was hard to miss the surprised look on his face. Heat flooded her cheeks. “Sorry.” She winced. If it had been anyone else, she wouldn’t have cared so much. But she’d already made a fool of herself in front of him once today.
He reached out his hand to steady her. “It’s okay.” His easygoing smile conveyed the message more than the words. “No harm done.”
She stepped to the right just as he stepped to the left, then they both stepped the other way. Noelle placed her hands on her hips and said, “If I didn’t know better, I’d think we were in junior high again.”
He laughed. “Yeah. Those dances were pretty lame, weren’t they? Actually, I’m just trying to head out the door.”
“And you’re too polite to tell me that I’m blocking your way.”
With a rueful grin, he drawled, “Well . . . yeah.”
Just then Kurt Levington came around the corner and hailed Pierce. “Hey, Pierce. You ready?”
“Yeah, let’s go.” To Noelle, he said, “See you later.”
“Yeah, see ya.”
She turned toward the bishop’s office when Pierce called, “Oh, hey, Noelle.”
Pausing in her tracks, she turned once more. “Hmm?”
“Come to the dance on Saturday night. I’ll dance with you then.”
Her smile froze. Noelle wouldn’t be attending another institute dance for a long time. She shook her head. “I can’t, but thanks, anyway.”
He seemed to take her answer in stride. “All right. Take care. And get some rest, okay?”
Noelle’s cheeks flamed. Pierce, ever the gentleman, would never refer directly to the bags under her eyes, but she knew they were unmistakable under the makeup she’d piled on.
She watched them leave regretfully. She hadn’t missed Kurt’s curious gaze as it darted back and forth between the two of them and wondered briefly what he was thinking before deciding that perhaps it was better not to know.
Noelle knocked on the bishop’s door and waited. Bishop Thornton opened the door, shook her hand, then waved her in. “Hello, Noelle. I have some visitors that you might be interested in seeing at the moment.”
Upon entering, she saw her parents sitting in the corner of the room. “Mom! Dad!” she exclaimed in surprise. Her dad, whose blond hair was turning white and whose face appeared a little more wrinkled even from the last time she’d seen him, smiled at her lovingly.
“Hello, sweetheart.” Her dad’s baritone voice was a balm to her soul. “We came up soon after Melody left yesterday and checked into a hotel. How are you holding up?”
Those exact words, which Pierce had asked her, opened the floodgates. She crumpled as the tears poured down her cheeks and felt herself being drawn into her father’s warm embrace. His dampened shirt withstood the deluge. She then felt her mother’s arms embrace her stiffly. Through the blur of her tears, Noelle could just make out the colors of her mother’s red- and white-flowered dress. Despite the momentary loss of control over her emotions, Noelle was grateful she couldn’t see the worry lines on the forehead of a face that looked much like her own or the penetrating eyes boring into hers in dismay. “I’m very sorry, Noelle. This has been such an unexpected turn of events. You’ve been very much on my mind since Melody told us. Why didn’t you call?” Beneath the caring words lay an almost imperceptible tone of censure.
“I—thought about it,” she choked out. “But I knew I would completely break down if I did. And then you’d feel like you had to come up here to rescue me.”
“Isn’t that why we’re here?” Samuel Jensen scolded gently. “To offer you support in your time of need? Noelle, this is what parents do for their children.” He let her cry longer until the tears slowly subsided.
Brenda Jensen offered her daughter a tissue, which Noelle gratefully accepted. After blowing her nose, Noelle sank down on one of the chairs surrounding the room while her parents repositioned a few to face her.
An awkward pause, followed by a silent look between her parents, left Noelle feeling unsettled. Her dad gave an almost imperceptible nod and Brenda began the conversation. “Noelle,” she said in a conciliatory voice, “we know you’ve had quite a difficult time with Melody and Chase’s surprise.”
“Surprise attack, you mean?”
Her mom sighed. “I know this is hard for you. And your father and I want you to know that we while we certainly can’t condone the way Melody and Chase acted by leaving you in the dark, we have spent a considerable amount of time counseling them. They feel bad for what they did, but after seeing them together this weekend and watching their interactions, we’ve talked it over at great length and come to a decision.”
“Which is?”
Brenda turned to her husband, who then turned to his daughter. “Noelle, we’ve decided to support Melody and Chase in their decision to be married.”
“What?” she cried. “But, Dad, that’s so unfair!”
Samuel smiled at her kindly even while his eyes clouded with pain. “Sweet Noelle, I know this hurts immensely. I’m sorry for that and wish it could be avoided. But something in your relationship with Chase has always troubled me. In the back of my mind, I wondered if Chase was the right fit for you. And then, as your mother said, once we saw Chase with Melody, it was like the missing puzzle piece had fallen into place.”
Pain as sharp as a knife sliced through her at his words. “So Melody serves a mission and then she’s up here for what? Six weeks? She’s your golden child who always does everything right. Everything always works out perfectly for her so that means that she should have my boyfriend too?”
Noelle knew she was on the verge of a mental breakdown, but right now she didn’t care. She wasn’t even sure if her words made sense. She just knew that it hurt unbearably to hear that her parents were okay with Melody and Chase moving on with their lives while she would be starting over. “What about me? I didn’t want to serve a mission. I wanted to continue my education and in the process, I found a really great guy. I thought we were going to get married. And then my sister steals him from behind my back. Is this supposed to be some kind of punishment for deciding not to serve a mission?”
Brenda sighed. “Noelle, listen to yourself. There is no punishment for a young woman deciding not to serve a mission. This has nothing to do with that. You’re upset. That’s understandable. But we’ve never favored one of you over the other, and we’re not about to,” she said firmly. “However, we think that you might want to take some time to think about your goals right now. Obviously, you thought that Chase would ask you to marry him. It is unfortunate for you that he didn’t. Now you need to decide what you are going to do next. You don’t have to decide today or even tomorrow. But just think about it. All right?”
She glared at them. “I think you’re missing the point. I can’t just stand by and happily watch Melody marry Chase. If he had found a different girl besides Melody, it would have still hurt, but I would have gotten over it. But how am I supposed to deal with this situation? Honestly, I can’t even be in the same room with her without wanting to tear her to shreds. And now I’m expected to shift my feelings for Chase from a romantic nature to a sisterly nature? How?”
“With the Lord’s help,” her dad answered quietly, confronting Noelle’s anger. “I know it sounds trite, Noelle, but He really will help you if you’ll turn to Him.”
Noelle said nothing. The happy, safe, predictable world as she knew it had turned on its side, leaving her wondering which way was up. Now she was supposed to just sweep all of these feelings under the rug and pretend that they didn’t exist. Her parents must think she was superhuman!
Her dad continued in a serious tone, “If it helps you feel better, you might be interested to know that I’ve had several long, serious discussions with C
hase over the way he cheated you. I let him know in no uncertain terms that he’d better be faithful to Melody in their marriage. Or he will have to answer for it—if not from a legal standpoint, then at least with the Lord. And if I read his signals correctly, I feel certain I made myself clear.”
Well, good, Noelle thought as she crossed her arms defensively. He deserved it. She wished that she could have seen him squirm.
“I know this hurts a lot,” Brenda continued, “but the way I see it, you have two choices, Noelle. You can support your sister in the happiest time of her life—she’s getting married, after all—or you can make this the most miserable time of her life. You alone have the ability to mend this rift or make it wider. Melody wants to mend things with you, but she says that you haven’t given her much of a chance. Although we reminded her that she needs to give you some breathing room, we’d also like for you to give an honest effort. Please, Noelle. This isn’t just for Melody’s happiness but for yours as well.”
Noelle hated it when her mom tried to be the attorney in the family. She felt that her dad did a pretty good job of that already. Deep within her heart, though, Noelle knew that her mom was right. She wanted to kick something. Silently, she was calling herself every name in the book for acting like a spoiled child. Chase had probably thought that she was immature too.
“When is the wedding?” she asked grudgingly.
“May twentieth, the day after graduation.”
“We expect you to be there,” her dad added.
She shrugged noncommittally. “We’ll see.”
Her mom looked like she wanted to argue the point, but a quiet knock on the door sounded. Bishop Thornton poked his head in and scanned the room. “How are things progressing in here?”
Samuel offered an obligatory smile. “About as we expected. Bishop, I appreciate you allowing us to use your office for this visit. Before we adjourn, I would like to give my daughter a father’s blessing, if that’s all right with Noelle.” He turned to her and she nodded. Samuel appeared to be relieved that he had won that small victory. When his features relaxed, he looked ten years younger. He then turned back to the bishop. “Would you care to join us?”